linabean once mentioned her conviction that Ronon really deserves his own cooking show, which immediately struck me as a Great Universal Immutable Truth.
This, of course, led to me speculating with
sparktastic that few things in life could be as great as attending a dinner party thrown by Ronon:
toomuchplor: Actually, just Ronon throwing a dinner party.
toomuchplor: Is the best image ever.
toomuchplor: I can totally see him getting this worrying obsession with Martha Stewart.
toomuchplor: But his hands are SO BIG
toomuchplor : all the crafts come out all mangled.
toomuchplor: And everyone is too scared to comment
toomuchplor: And every time he leaves the room they all lean across the dining table and whisper, "Is *your* napkin ring leaking glue all over?"
toomuchplor: "No, but I think mine has a piece of deer carcass in it!"
toomuchplor: "That's nothing! My wine charm is ALIVE."
sparktastic: ahahahahaha
sparktastic: you have to stoppppppp
toomuchplor: And Ronon bustles back in with a chafing dish, wearing these big oven mitts, saying, "Okay, who wants some cherries jubilee?" and busts out a flamethrower and sets his pinecone-and-antlers centerpiece on fire.
toomuchplor: hahahahahahahahahaha
sparktastic: DUDE
sparktastic: *dies*
toomuchplor: And then he's all, "Oh no. It was so perfect up until now."
toomuchplor: "Martha would be so disappointed."
toomuchplor: And John would heave this long-suffering sigh.
toomuchplor: And get up from the table
toomuchplor: And step into the kitchen
toomuchplor: And everyone's all, "Where's he going?'
toomuchplor : And in five minutes he emerges carrying a frosted four-layer cake complete with real orchids and piped filigree
toomuchplor: And slams it down on the charred table.
toomuchplor: And they stare.
toomuchplor: And he says, "What? So I like to bake sometimes."
sparktastic: ahahahahahah
toomuchplor: And Rodney goes all glowy and sex-crazed and hauls John back into the kitchen to ravish him with the icing bowl and cake beaters.
toomuchplor: Everyone else talks loudly and eats cake and pretends not to hear the ecstatic cries of "YOU ARE THE PERFECT MAN!"
toomuchplor: "IF ONLY YOU HAD AN ASS."
toomuchplor: Followed by, "Hey! I have an ass!"
sparktastic: hahahahahahahah
toomuchplor: Followed by, "Right, so why does it feel like I've got two mandarin oranges in my hands instead of, oh, I don't know, AN ASS?"
toomuchplor: And John comes back into the dining room all smeared with icing and looking grumpy
toomuchplor: haha
sparktastic: dude
sparktastic: I have no idea what you've been smoking
sparktastic: but I want some
Of course, another Great Universal Immutable Truth, in my mind, is that Rodney has a sex advice column that he writes under a pseudonym on the unofficial Atlantis weekly newsletter. Because who wouldn't want sex advice from Rodney McKay? I mean, REALLY.
In fact, it would be great if people commented with the sort of sex advice requests the lonely and strange citizens of Atlantis would bring forward. Because then I could write Rodney's answers and it could be Way Too Much Fun. *bg*
Comments
Bite me.
Also, keep this up and there won't be anything to enter in Excel.