Stolen from lyrawing. The first line of fic written in each month of 2006:



I'm pasting this together like it's one story because it's funnier that way:

Absolutely impossible not to look. Tonight’s Smallville is far stupider than last night’s episode, though it probably doesn’t help that Michael is watching while sober this time. Seven steps, maybe eight, down the dark lamp-lit sidewalk before Tom’s hand clamps down around Michael’s bicep. When they can’t find a ping-pong ball, Michael decrees that they will use an invisible ball.

“What is it?”

There’s a classified ads page on the Atlantis intranet. The next day, John gets a PDF questionnaire in his new e-mail from someone using a depressingly non-descript e-mail alias.

“No, no no no no,” Rodney natters desperately, trying to peel himself away from Sheppard’s limbs no more quickly than Sheppard is attempting to wrap his body around Rodney’s. Rodney trips over his untied shoelace, staggers two steps forward, and finds himself kneeling on the pavement with his palms burning and his forehead bumping up against a pair of denim-clad knees.

January: Poison and Fire
February: Part 4 of You Keep Me High
March: NOTHING OMG MONTH OF USELESSNESS
April: NOTHING OMG 2nd MONTH OF USELESSNESS
May: NOTHING OMG 3rd MONTH OF USELESSNESS
June: Part 10 of You Keep Me High
July: Drabbles
August: Adhere to Me
September: Part 1 of Wanted
October: Part 4 of Wanted
November: Hold Me Tight
December: The Theory of Acquired Characters

In conclusion, I have been useless for 25% of this year. Go me!