Super-Onesie!

[toomuchplor]

toomuchplor says: I always thought Superman's tights went all the way down.

iykwim says: me too

toomuchplor says: I wonder if this means that his tights are crotchless, too.

iykwim says: it must mean that!

toomuchplor says: And assless.
toomuchplor says: Does crotchless imply asslessness?

iykwim says: um...
iykwim says: i don't think so
iykwim says: maybe?

toomuchplor says: See, now I'm picturing the whole Superman getup as being pieced together.
toomuchplor says: Like, wherever colours intersect, there's no overlap.

iykwim says: like, he's wearing a giant onezie?


toomuchplor says: I was absolutely hoping you'd get to that word.

iykwim says: Superman *SO* wears a onezie! How are people supposed to respect him after that?

toomuchplor says: But wouldn't his feet get sweaty in those boots?
toomuchplor says: I bet the Super Boots are really stanky.
toomuchplor says: I mean, presumably Superman does sweat.
toomuchplor says: We've seen sweaty Clark.
toomuchplor says: And he's working pretty hard with all the superhero stuff.

iykwim says: he works *moderately* hard at least

toomuchplor says: Maybe the whole back of the red Super Pannies comes down like a trapdoor.

iykwim says: awesome

toomuchplor says: Because it's not like he's going to wriggle out of the whole onesie just for *that*.

iykwim says: or maybe he's got a Super catheter!

toomuchplor says: And by *that*, I mean sex with Lex Luthor.
toomuchplor says: He can Super Hold It.

iykwim says: haha... OHHH... THAT!

toomuchplor says: I think in his head, Superman refers to everything he owns/touches with the prefix 'Super'.
toomuchplor says: But just in his head.

iykwim says: mmm... let me grab my Super toothbrush to clean my Super teeth!

toomuchplor says: "La la la, got to feed the Super Goldfish with some Super Fish Food!"

iykwim says: squeezing out the Super paste...

toomuchplor says: "Hey, the Super Phone is ringing!"
toomuchplor says: "It's probably Super Mom!"

iykwim says: "I'll Super get it!"

iykwim says: it'd be like the Smurfs -- but less annoying.

toomuchplor says: And then one day he just lets it slip --
toomuchplor says: "Lex! I told you not to touch my Super Remote!"
toomuchplor says: "Erm."
toomuchplor says: ...

iykwim says: hahahaha

toomuchplor says: "By which I mean my remote control."

iykwim says: "I mean.... just don't... Golden Girls is coming on..."


toomuchplor says: And Lex'd be all *level look*
toomuchplor says: "You are spending far too much time with that freakshow, Wayne."

iykwim says: "I love Super Betty White"

toomuchplor says: And Clark'd be all, "He totally stole that from me!"
toomuchplor says: "Bat this, bat that!"

iykwim says: Lex: "Whatever, this is nowhere as cool as the Bat Remote"

toomuchplor says: Clark: "Why have a *bat* couch when you can have a SUPER couch?'

iykwim says: "It doesn't NEED wings to fly"

toomuchplor says: Lex: *leaves room*

iykwim says: it's true though... a Bat couch would have little use...
iykwim says: a SUPER couch, however... *insert porno music*

toomuchplor says: Clark: "Oh fuck, there goes my Super Love Monkey."
toomuchplor says: Clark *so* watches Golden Girls.
toomuchplor says: In his underwear.
toomuchplor says: With a bottle of hand lotion.

iykwim says: ...
iykwim says: does he have Super Psoriasis?

toomuchplor says: Yes, that's why.

iykwim says: OHH... k... I didn't get why before...

toomuchplor says: *ducks*

iykwim says: thanks for clearing that up for me.

toomuchplor says: No problem.